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well today has been really shitty :( 

i think i might be starting my period because all of a sudden i am completely lethargic and ¬†unmotivated and sore and HUNGRY!! all that talk about being proud and healthy and beating the binge…yeah well these last 2 days that has gone completely out the window. this is so frustrating i was doing sooooo well!!! if anyone reads this and they have any tips for healthy/ low calorie comfort food/ pms diet/ health tips i would seriously appreciate it because i get it super bad and its really hard for me to come back from that :/

seriously please help!!


i think i am going to stop weighing myself….that or I’m not going to weigh myself until I’m happy with the way i look. because so far the number hasn’t changed that much but i can see and feel myself changing so i am starting that instead of desperately clinging to an abstract number that doesntactually declare my progress but still seems to have a huge impact on my feelings of self worth, i should just focus on me and what feels good and measure my progress in how much tighter i can put on my belt, how flatter my stomach feels when i sit down, how when i put my hands on my hips i can feel the muscle underneath, how slowly my features are becoming sharper and more defined, how i can run harder and longer, how i want to eat healthily, how happy i am :)¬†

for me this feels like a revolution even though its just one more tiny change…but its all the tiny changes that are going to make a difference in the end right?¬†


i am going to weigh in in one week. 

starting today. now that I’m not PMSing lolz¬†

i will workout every day even if it is only 20 mins.

i will eat dairy free and gluten free at least every other day of the week. 

i will not eat bread/ pasta more than twice this week. 

i will eat a good protein packed breakfast. 

i will drink lots of water. 

i will obey proper portion sizes. 

i will stay positive, motivated, and happy :) 

i know that no one will read this but if you do and you wanna give me any support, encouragement, healthy recipe ideas i would really appreciate it :)